We live in a sex-crazed world

I was up at 4:30a this morning, my head filled with, you don't want to know. I guess those images and feelings are related to past trauma, like demons invading my soul. These demons look like people though and they act like a bunch of horny men and women. So gross. Every single day and night for 14 years. Every time I close my eyes and try to find peace, there is an image of men and their sexual energy trying to dominate my thoughts and my soul.

I guess it's a consequence of culture. We live in a sex-crazed world where everything we see is dominated by someone else's sex drive in one way or another. I just wish I didn't have to awaken to it first thing every morning.

I remember as a child when people would talk to me and I would lose interest, I would just go into my mind and hide from the words they would say, only coming back to nod and make them believe that I was still listening. It was my safe space. It was my retreat, my sanctuary from whatever noise was making my stomach turn.

I lost that sanctuary, and now my sanctuary is my work. My talismans bring that peace and love I once had inside my own head. Now when I focus on my beautiful pendants and bracelets, I can find a sense of joy that I lost when these demons started filling my head with their neediness and sexual energy.

My work fills my soul and without it, I would be lost. It makes me stay fully present and engaged, and I love it! The harmony with my outer world while I work on my talismans makes me believe in real magic and keeps me filled with light and love. It motivates and drives me forward to the next phases of my journey.

I have already updated my website with Candice's blog, posted about it to 2 platforms, had my second cup of coffee and am getting ready to package and ship sales from the weekend.

I feel blessed thanks to you all. I know what I share is TMI, but it's my truth and while I hate it and wish it wasn't so, it's my reality and I have to accept it in order to move passed it.

So, thank you for giving me a platform to work through my issues and come to terms with my now, because every new moment that I am given is an opportunity to change and be better.

I'm keeping this short and sweet because I know how people hate to read on this platform, but I am using it to begin my personal blog on my website. I need to write and this is how I choose to begin, with my posts in real-time and the thoughts flow uncensored and raw.